the long road home.

Trust me – this will be TLTR 🙂

Well, I’ve been home for less than 24 hours and decided I better write some stuff down or I will completely forget.  Not that there are life-shattering events to record.  I just feel there needs to be a closing statement, a final summation, or whatever it is you call it 😊

So many things.  I tried to go into the Camino with no expectations – but it’s pretty hard to do that when you are trying to learn all you can about it, following Facebook pages regarding the journey – everyone has different perspectives and experiences.

Trying to go into this without any expectations, but with expectations (haaaha) that we would be following a sort of regiment: starting early, walking for a few hours, pushing it a little bit, stopping often at cafes and villages and other places, relaxing, drinking coffee, taking breaks, reaching our daily destination, checking into our Airbnb or hotel, showering, resting up, then heading out to the hot spots of the communities, having a nice dinner, listening to music, walking around the town, headed back to our place, getting a good nights’ rest, waking up, rinse, repeat.

Nothing goes as planned, does it?  Lesson #1 (on the Camino, you are supposed to learn many life lessons, so I’m diving deep to give you what I may or may not have learned): Go with the flow. 

I sorta vaguely recall getting annoyed by the saying, “the Camino provides!” This was the typical response to questions on the FB group of concerns about how to know the way, what do you bring, who, why, where – and that was always the glib answer.  “The Camino provides.”

I also realize that this has sorta been my life mantra.  “Go with the flow” “Absorb it”. But these, and cliches like these, are rarely helpful for the people going through the current trial or challenge. 

So… the result of this – when trudging up another hill on our journey, I possibly whispered quietly to myself to the people wishing me “buen camino” at times,  “I Got your Buen!”

These young, athletic, capable tik tockers who blithely passed us – you know – the type that when you are on the ski hill tangled up in your skis and covered in an avalanche, and a youngster swishes up, stops instantly, and says, “are you okay?” 

Bethany and I were certainly not as exuberant as they were  Those youngsters who danced and sang and passed us on the trail!

Buen Camino. My arse.

I wasn’t necessarily “absorbing” the experience as I so often preach.

WE could have done a video though; elderly woman and loving daughter doing the Camino. In this scene, Bethany is pouring some water on her mother’s wounds and adding Neosporin to prevent infection for her injuries after a fall on the trail.

Looking back, lesson #2:  I CAN do hard things. 

It may not seem like it until there seems to be no choice but to keep going.  No other options.  Well, there’s always some options, I suppose – but if you have at least a little crumb of dignity and pride, the options are limited. There was no way I was gonna come back from the experience and have to confess that I couldn’t make it – that I ubered my way between the small towns and villages.  With Bethany’s constant encouragement, I walked it! And it was awesome!

So – that brings me to Lesson #3: Pride.  Pride is really a bad thing.  After all, pride is what caused the fall of Lucifer – the most glorious angel in heaven.  Long story, but the fall of Lucifer is why we have evil in the world today. Lucifer – Satan – and legions of other angels decided they wanted to be God – which of course, they couldn’t – not the God of Eternity anyway. 

But, I digress. Where was I? Uhmmm,  I actually wanted to say that maybe pride can be a good thing.  Or maybe there is a different word to describe the motivation and determination to complete something difficult.  And doing it. It’s a good feeling.

Lesson #5 Don’t live your life based on feelings.  That is a HUGE problem for me.  I don’t WANT to – I don’t FEEL like it.  I don’t BELIEVE it, I don’t FEEL it’s true, etc. etc. So, I don’t.

Feelings are fickle.  We have to remind ourselves of what is True.

I guess before you can do that, you have to articulate specifically what you believe it true.

Lesson #6 – sometimes the lessons you learn do not become apparent until later. 

I had hopes that I would come home a renewed, revived, more vibrant, more spiritual, more loving and warm person. 

Not sure if that happened, hahaa.  I still feel like I have a cold, cold heart.

But I heard an AMAZING homily a few days ago – (was able to get podcasts/internet in Europe) that was so beautiful.  The priest said the church was celebrating “the Sacred Heart of Jesus”.  I didn’t even know that it was a special Day in the life of the Church – but anyway, he said something about letting the burning heart of Jesus, which is pure love, surround your cold heart and transfer His pure love into your heart – and you will reach out to others with pure love.

It seems to be the remedy for me – but it’s not that easy.  For example, I have a love-hate relationship with Facebook and pretty much all of social media.  It just tends to make me mad.  It’s not edifying. I do enjoy some personal posts, and I follow groups that I want to learn more about – but I waste hours scrolling, saving down posts that I want to read later, blocking ads, falling prey to new products to buy, new projects to start, snarling at crap I read or disagree with, etc., – you know what I mean.  I want to get off that roller coaster. 

I have books to read.  Piano music to learn.  Friends and fam to spend time with! A book to write. It’s ridiculous.  Scroll and scroll and scroll – what a colossal waste of time. 

Lession # 7 – it’s got to stop.  The time wasted.  Nothing really matters except “walk humbly, do justice, love mercy”. (Quoted from the Prophet Micah)

It sounds so simple.

I do want to do it the Camino again. It sounds crazy because it was pretty difficult at times. It’s going to take a few days for my feet to heal- but maybe it’s like having a baby. You don’t remember the pain.

2026. Who’s in?